I've joined a study group online for the book Unexpected Blessings, the Joys and Possibilities in a Special-Needs Family hosted by the author Sandra Peoples ( link to book ). It is a Bible centered book that gives a Christian perspective on the topic of disability, and raising special needs children. A group of special needs parents enrolled in a group on Facebook dissect the book and share experiences on their journeys with their children. The author has 4 other Christian, special-needs authors as guests, some of whose books I’ve already read.
The first author to be interviewed was Becky Davidson, mom to a teenage boy with autism, president of Rising Above Ministries, co-author of Common Man, Extraordinary Call and a widow. Becky shared how at one point in her journey she spoke about her mistrust of God after her husband's death. She was a faithful christian and was a leader of ministries that helped people like herself, living with a disabled child and yet, God took away her husband and left her a widow. This made me think about what happens when we pray and pray for healing, restoration , good things in our lives and they don't happen? Where do we stand with God when God doesn't answer our prayers? Why pray for things at all?
There is a saying, "Hope for the best, expect the worst and you won't be disappointed.” At some point, I realize our faith has to mature beyond just asking God to give us things that make life easier and better. It's like children ask for things from their parents because the adults hold the purse strings and are responsible for the care and well being of their children. But, as children grow, they take responsibility for their own lives and are able to do things for themselves. Likewise, our faith starts off by asking God for things to be taken care of but as our faith matures, so must our demands. We become co-creators with God and have to be willing to accept things that happen in our lives with grace. Didn't Jesus say, "In life, you will have troubles, but I am with you always". I don't expect all my problems to go away or be shielded from life's troubles because I found faith. But, I do expect to have angels, Jesus, God and the heavenly realms to be with me, by my side, in my earthly trials giving me strength, encouragement and support as I walk through the dark valleys. And, there have been many trials in life and having a special needs child is not one of the worst of them. Just because I found God doesn't mean all my troubles disappear. There is a Zen Buddhist saying, "Before enlightenment, chop wood, fetch water. After enlightenment, chop wood, fetch water."
There is a blogger by the name of Kurt Koontz who shared his experience as a traveler in India and encountered a yogi who said he doesn't worry about the outcome of any situation.He said, "Life is so chaotic and most things are out of our control" So, through his particular faith he has come to learn to just unconditionally accept what happens as it happens and to release the ego's desire for wanting things to happen as it wants. That's a very big thing to achieve mentally and I'm not sure I am a master at that, yet. But, it's something worth striving for at least for my mental health.
What I have found in faith is a peace from anxiety, a knowing I'm not walking alone but have a spiritual team by my side, both in heaven and on earth, giving me healing, good counsel and encouragement. That is all I've come to expect from my faith and I am satisfied with it. I still have worries and fears about the future occasionally but when I do, I know I can go to prayer for comfort and it really does help settle me. This life is just a short and strange blip in time before we all go to our real home in the afterlife. Hopefully, it's much nicer and pleasant than this Earth classroom. Maybe the Soviet communists were right when they said "Religion is the opiate of the masses", and what's wrong with that? If it helps ease pain, relieve anxiety, gives hope and a sense of belonging and love, I don't see anything wrong with it.
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